7 confidence barriers expats face — and how to break them

This article looks at the most common confidence barriers expats face: from language anxiety and social uncertainty to workplace self-doubt and burnout. Drawing on research and expat data, it explores why these challenges are so common and, more importantly, what actually helps to overcome them. Rather than quick fixes, the focus is on practical, evidence-based ways to rebuild confidence over time and navigate life abroad with more ease.

• Fear of making mistakes when speaking
• Feeling like an outsider socially
• Uncertainty around cultural “rules”
• Loss of workplace confidence
• The “I’m not cut out for this” mindset
• Adaptation fatigue and burnout
• Losing motivation when progress feels slow

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1. Fear of making mistakes when speaking

One of the most common confidence barriers expats face is anxiety around speaking the local language. Even those with solid grammar knowledge often hesitate in real conversations, worried about sounding “wrong” or being judged.

This hesitation has been widely studied. In a large meta-analysis examining the relationship between language learning and confidence, researchers found that “self-efficacy beliefs and language proficiency are positively related”. In other words, confidence and ability reinforce each other — and lack of confidence can actively slow progress.

How to break the fear of making mistakes:
Instead of aiming for correctness, focus on communicative success. Being understood matters far more than getting every verb tense right. Short, low-pressure interactions like a quick question, a simple comment, are often more effective than waiting until you feel “ready” (a moment that rarely arrives on its own).

2. Feeling like an outsider socially

Social confidence is another major barrier expats face, especially in the first months abroad. Many people report feeling capable at work, yet unsure how to connect socially — whether it’s joining a group conversation or figuring out when small talk starts and ends.

The InterNations Expat Insider survey, one of the largest global studies on expat life, repeatedly highlights this challenge. In its “Ease of Settling In” index, language and social integration rank among the most difficult aspects of expat life.

Summarising expat survey data, VisitWorld Today notes that “language barriers and fear of isolation were common problems before moving”, underlining how strongly social confidence is tied to communication.

How to break feeling like an outsider:
Rather than aiming for instant friendships, focus on repeated social exposure. Confidence often grows faster in structured or recurring settings: classes, clubs, regular meetups where interaction feels expected and familiarity builds naturally. Friendship usually follows comfort, not the other way around.

3. Uncertainty around cultural “rules”

Another subtle but powerful barrier expats face is uncertainty around unspoken cultural norms. Not knowing how to behave or worrying about behaving incorrectly can lead to overthinking, second-guessing, and sometimes choosing silence over saying the “wrong” thing.

Research in cross-cultural psychology shows that unfamiliar social rules increase stress and reduce confidence, particularly in the early stages of living abroad. In their widely cited work on cultural adjustment, psychologists Colleen Ward and Anthony Kennedy found that difficulties in understanding host-culture norms are strongly linked to psychological stress and poorer adjustment outcomes. They note that “sociocultural difficulties are a major source of stress for sojourners during the initial phase of cross-cultural contact”.

How to break the uncertainty about cultural norms:
Replace the pressure to “get it right” with observation and curiosity. Cultural confidence develops through exposure and pattern recognition, not memorisation. Most locals don’t expect perfection; they expect effort.

4. Loss of workplace confidence

Many expats experience a noticeable dip in professional confidence after relocating. Even when technical skills remain unchanged, expressing those skills in another language or cultural framework can feel unexpectedly difficult.

OECD research highlights how language proficiency directly affects workplace integration and labour-market outcomes. According to the OECD, differences in language skills account for a significant share of employment gaps among migrants and expats.

How to break the loss of workplace confidence:
Separate competence from communication. You’re not starting over, you’re translating your skills. Focus on what works, prepare for repeat situations, and let results, not hesitation, rebuild your confidence.

5. The “I’m not cut out for this” mindset

Repeated small challenges can erode confidence over time, leading expats to question their ability to cope altogether. Researchers studying expatriate adjustment have found that individual traits such as self-efficacy, a belief in one’s ability to handle challenges, are strongly linked to how well people adjust to life abroad. In research on cross-cultural adaptation, scholars note that personality characteristics including self-efficacy are significantly positively associated with expatriate adjustment outcomes (meta-analysis of expatriate personality and adjustment research).

How to break the mindset:
Confidence returns through evidence. Tracking small, tangible successes like navigating an appointment alone, handling a conversation more smoothly than last month helps rebuild belief in your ability to manage challenges.

6. Adaptation fatigue and burnout

Constantly operating in a second language and unfamiliar culture creates cognitive load. Over time, this can lead to exhaustion, often mistaken for a lack of motivation or “not trying hard enough.”

Research on acculturative stress shows that prolonged adaptation pressure has a measurable impact on well-being and perceived competence. One study found that “acculturation stress has a significant impact on self-efficacy and well-being” 

How to break adaptation fatigue:
Reducing friction helps. Routines, familiar formats, and planned rest give your brain a break from constant decision-making. Rest isn’t a step backwards, it’s how confidence recovers.

7. Losing motivation when progress feels slow

Finally, many expats struggle when progress feels invisible. Confidence often dips during plateaus, even as learning continues beneath the surface.

Language learning research shows that motivation and confidence fluctuate long before progress becomes visible.

How to break the loss of motivation:
Redefine progress. If everyday life feels a little easier than it did a few months ago, that matters. Greater independence, less stress, and more comfort in daily situations are all real signs that you’re moving forward, even when it doesn’t feel dramatic.

Confidence grows through use, not perfection

Every expat faces confidence barriers. They are not signs of failure, but predictable responses to change. Research consistently shows that confidence abroad develops through repeated exposure, realistic expectations, and time.

Confidence doesn’t arrive all at once. It grows quietly, interaction by interaction — until one day, you realise that what once felt unfamiliar now feels almost normal.

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